Life just happens.........

Well we started the end of May with a severe bout with a stomach flu after Rock & Roll that hit the whole family.  After we fully recovered from that summer was here...or at least for us since Fuss got out of school early.  I did run Helvatia only to jack my IT band up and not be able to run the last 3 miles and have my worst race so far.  Well I figured I would just rest up and after Montana just get back to my training so my leg could heal.  I wasn't planning on spending the rest of the month in and out of the Dr's office, ER or urgent care with both girls.  It was more than draining to say the least.  I was ready to hit the trail again but as soon as we got back from Montana my hip started hurting badly, then my back then.....where does it end.  I am now realizing that my marathon this year will not happen and that pisses me off.  And all the while I have been sticking to a strict diet to help with my IBS.  Which at least that has helped.

So I have come to the conclusion that this year was not totally a bust.  I got 3 halves in and I still have some time to get a few more races in.  They may not be the ones I wanted but I will get some in.

I have also realized that my body is begging to get healthy.  I have stuck to my eating restrictions and even now when I could start adding stuff back in I am not sure I want too.  It is now more of a habit and I actually enjoy it to some degree.  I am down to a weight I have not seen since my early 20's and just a few lbs away from my weight in high school which is quite fitting since it is my 20 year reunion this weekend. 

I have been battling the evils of self destructive thoughts.  I think I am a failure for not hitting all my goals but then I have to remember even I thought I was nuts to have the goals I did for the year.  But as I have been trying to come to terms with it all....I am very competitive with my self even and this seems minor but is a huge struggle for me.....I have to realize I have done a lot and I have learned so much about myself this year so far.  And I wouldn't give that up for anything.

I have learned I am much stronger than I have ever thought I was.  I have learned my husband is the most amazing man I could have ever asked for and loves me more than I could have asked for or deserve.  And my 2 little angels, if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be whole.  They do make me who I am now and I love them more than they will ever know. 

And I have also had to come to terms with the fact that putting your head in the ground when something is happening that you don't want to see or something you can't fix won't make it go away.  And I do have demons of some OCD that will always be a battle.

The main thing is I need to have fun with life and go with the flow and try...try so very hard to just be the best person I can be and the rest will fall into place.  And that includes getting rid of some influences people and things that don't make me happy.  I have too much stuff that doesn't belong in my life or our family's life.  And too many people that really don't have any place in my life especially on FB. 

So here is to working on the motto I would love to live my life by....You have life and need to live it to your fullest and without too many regrets.

Cheers and happy days ahead.

Oops

Well I got sick and hand wrote my food journal...and it got shredded.  So I will start from this weekend.  =-)

Day 6

Breakfast:  Hemp shake w/ L-glutamine, B vit, mixed berries, half banana & rice milk
Lunch: left over pizza
Dinner: Roasted romaine salad, asparagus w/aunties sauce, grilled citrus marinated chicken/shrimp, coconut/cilantro rice
Snack: slice of pizza

Ran 10 miles
Good day but had to wait to run since Rob had to sleep in from going in to work for 6 hrs.  Auntie & Uncle came over for dinner.

weight: 131.1     probably from eating the pizza so late at night.

Day 5 Saturday

Breakfast: Gorilla Munch w/rice milk
Lunch: Quinoa w/kale   tortilla chips and hummus
Dinner: GF pizza with BBQ chicken, red peppers, onions, mushrooms, cilantro & tomatoes

Ate way too much and ended up eating pretty late 8:30

Took a nice long nap which pushed Dinner back.

Went to bed about 11:00
weight: 130.9

Day 4 Friday

Breakfast: Egg with toast
Lunch: quinoa, beans
Dinner: quinoa, beans, kale
Snacks: Corn tortilla chips with salsa and hummus

Stayed up way to late waiting for Rob to come home.  Rough night.
Lower body leg workout

Weight: 130.6

Day 3

Day 3...off to a much better start.

Morning Hemp Shake w/vit B, L-glutamine, fruit, rice milk and some apple juice.

Ran 4+ miles at club

Lunch: Roasted red pepper rice with white beans and tuna

Snack: Carrots

Dinner: Repeat of lunch but with sauteed greens on the side

Dessert: Piece of GF bread with butter & honey.

Weight: 129.8

Today was a struggle with wanting to nibble on things.  I need to get some dips that I can use for veggies.

Day 2

Well the day seemed to start out great.  Until I grabbed Lindsey's soy milk instead of my rice milk and I had a severe allergic reaction.  Didn't make it to the gym and missed out on lunch with friends but this was a mistake I won't make again.

So I only had half my shake...threw the rest out after I realized I was having a reaction.

Lunch: Potatoes
Snack: Grilled Chicken
Dinner: Grilled Talipia, rice with peppers, Auntie's Asparagus and fruit salad with lime/honey/ginger light dressing

EmergenC with L-glutamine & Vit B liquid

Weight: 131.2

It was quite a bump in the road...first off I am not supposed to have the soy and second I really didn't plan on extreme pain and throwing up.  Bounced back okay, I just wished I didn't miss my gym time.

Day 1

I decided to just journal my daily diet/exercise for my restriction diet...and possibly on to the marathon.  This will make it easier for me to look back and see what worked and what didn't.

Well Day 1.  It will be a new way of thinking and a battle for my will power too.  No more gluten, dairy, red meat, peanuts, almonds, soy, coffee, caffeine, cocoa and several other things for me.  Many things I have sort of cut out but there were still days of cheating.  Now I start and today wasn't that bad.  But like everything day 1 is just that day 1.  I am mostly excited to see how my body changes on the inside and out. 
Breakfast: Hemp protein shake with fruit, rice milk, vitamin B liquid, L glutamine powder(?) and banana.

Work out: upper body weights until back cramped up.

Lunch: Potatoes w/sour kraut and hard boiled eggs

Snack: Watermelon all day long

Dinner: Brown rice, grilled citrus/ginger/garlic marinated chicken, sauteed greens (beet, chard & collard) and watermelon


Snack: I needed a crunchy sweet snack so a half cup total of gorilla munch with some cinnamon chex mix.

Overall not a bad day.  Need more veggies to snack on but otherwise a good day.

Weight: 132

Miracles

When my mom got sick I prayed and prayed for a miracle.  A miracle that some how some way all that cancer all over her body would disappear.  That miracle never came.

Now my friend is in the final stages of a short but hard battle with cancer.  We all prayed for a miracle to happen for the cancer to shrink and for her to be okay.  That miracle seems to not be possible.

As I was driving today realizing this is the second time my prayers for a miracle seemed to not have happened.  But then I realized maybe the miracle with my mom is that I made it out okay...that the miracle that I was asking for was given to me in the form of Rob and Lindsey being here for me to make it through all of the dark days ahead.  Without them, I honestly don't think I would be in as good of a place that I can be...emotionally, physically and even spiritually.  So now I realize I need to pray for the miracle of survival for my friends family.  For her loving husband and their Granddaughter that has grown up with her grandmother in her life as a constant.   And for the daughters to find more good hours than bad in the days ahead. 

I know what they are up against and I now realize I didn't get the miracle I asked for but it is a miracle I survived it.  And I am praying they now get that same miracle...day by day...hour by hour...minute by minute...a little peace in their heart.

If I only had listened!

So since my last post we had Christmas, a colonoscopy and New Years.  Of course I lost a few pounds from the colonoscopy from starving.  =-)  But it made me realize that when I cut out stuff from my diet and my system was cleaned out...my tummy was almost flat.  Yes I know that I can't starve myself to keep a flat stomach or even be on a liquid diet.  After I was given good results from my colonoscopy I realized I finally need to look into my diet and see what I am eating that is probably causing all my issues.  I have never been a huge fan of meat but do love the 1-2x a year BBQ steak and chicken is a staple around here but I don't mind tofu or other alternative protien sources either.  So I checked out books and finally started reading up on IBS/Fibromyalgia and eating for my blood type.  I came to the conclusion that I can keep living the way I am living or I can make some sacrifices and feel so much better and I would be that much healthier.  For years off and on people asked if I had a lactose intolerance.  I always associated that to other issues that I don't have.  After reading up on the fact that dairy is one of the hardest food sources to digest and that it is one of the top things to cut out of your diet when you have IBS.  I also now have two beautiful little girls that already show signs of IBS and I don't want them to go through what I went through growing up and into my 30's.

So the experiment started.  I have cut almost all dairy out of my diet for about 2 weeks now.  And along the way discovered I am allergic to soy milk...but can eat other soy products.  Almond or coconut or rice milk is my new go to milk.  I do miss a nice glass of fat free milk but I can do without if it means living a more comfortable everyday life.

I also started cutting down on meat, which has been fairly easily since I don't really crave it all that much and never really have.  Tofu is my new best friend.

Gluten Free is also something I work with.  But I have only done GF when it is possible or easily workable into my meal plan. 

Carbonation was also something I loved...sparkling water and seltzer were my go to instead of soda.  But that can cause bloating.

So far I have lost 6 lbs since my last post.  And mostly it has been the last 2 weeks when I started experimenting with this.  Do I miss my milk, sparkling water and french bread YES!!!  But when I look in the mirror and I can see a somewhat flat stomach and with just a little toning and core work I can get back to where I was 10 years ago...I dont' miss it that much.  Trying to find recipes that are dairy free, meat free and gluten free all at once is a struggle so I do what I can.  If it has gluten....who cares or a little chicken that is okay too.  I at this point I am not going to say "I WILL NEVER EAT..........AGAIN!"  Because after my 1/2 marathon I might just have to get an In-n-Out burger...yes.  Will I pay for it later Yes.  Will I ever fully give up cheesecake...No...but I will eat it only on special occasions.  It is all about balance and finding out what works for my body.  I have not felt like this in so many years it is amazing.  Not feeling like I am constantly bloated and like there is a 10lb ball in my stomach feels amazing. 

This is definitely not for everyone and I would never say that.  But after reading what works for Type A blood type and for people suffering from IBS and I make the changes and I see a difference pretty much immediately...it works for me and that is all I care about.

So here is to a new lifestyle and a new me and a healthier happier family.  And next time when someone suggests something I will not just brush it away and actually look into what they have to say.